Saturday, November 24, 2007

Holiday shopping

We went and finished part of our remaining holiday shopping today. I do most of the shopping online, and this year I did a lot of shopping on Etsy, but there are just some things we had to go to the store for. It wasn't horrible, but it was busy enough to make me a bit twitchy. We went to Bed, Bath & Beyond which is a store I can get lost in because I love kitchen tools and gadgets. I had to make my usual pilgrimage to the wall of nice knives where I could stare longingly at the high end sets from Wusthof and J.A. Henkels before moving on. Yes, I'm probably a knife snob, but I think that you should always go for the nicer kitchen knives because of the quality.

After that it was off to the bookstore to look for something for my niece. At last report she was still into dinosaurs, bugs, prehistoric animals, and astronomy so it's always fun to look for books for her. I still think it's funny that I lived up to the promise I made to my sister when K was a baby and my sister told me they didn't want really girly stuff. I said then that it would mean I would have to get K interested in dinosaurs and I did. I found a couple of great books on prehistoric animals for her and a new Dover book for myself.

All in all it was a good trip, we got what we needed and I didn't kill anyone.

Saturday, November 10, 2007


I think one of the most difficult things for me is knowing how to respond to certain things. This one of the reasons I have mixed feelings on trying to find E's blog. I have a pretty good idea about some of the things he might have written about and I know what my response would be to them because they are things we've gone over many times. The problem is I'm starting to get the impression he is hoping that I do find it because he wants me to know some of these things. In my mind it's really a no win situation because I'm not going to feel like I can respond on the blog, plus if he writes about some of the things I expect I've said my piece on them and we haven't gotten anywhere with it. I don't think going through the same discussion on the 'net is going give us a different outcome and I don't want to go into it feeling like I have to defend my side of things yet again.

I love him and I know there are these things that we need to work on but we seem to be stuck on details at this point. Things are this way because of a lot of little decisions we both made and little things we both did. On top of that there are things I can't really compromise on anymore because of my health. No matter how much either of us may want it things can't go back to being exactly how they were and I hate feeling like that is the standard I'm being held to.

Thursday, November 08, 2007

Uh. . .what happened to my hair?

I got my hair cut last Saturday and I'm still not used to it. It's . . .well, it's a bit shorter than waist length, it's flippy and I can do that dramatic toss over the shoulder with it that you see in shampoo commercials. Now I know that this may not sound serious to many people but getting it cut back to that point is pretty short for me, the stylist was guessing she cut about 20 inches off. I've only run across a couple of down sides to it really. The first is that I absolutely have to have it pulled back if I'm going to housework or anything that requires I bend over because otherwise it all falls forward and I look like Cousin It. The second is that it had caused me to end up walking around with a scrunchie on my wrist, and that is just not me.

Saturday, November 03, 2007

Medicated for your safety. . .more or less

Yes, I admit it, I do the better living through anti-depressants thing and it has made a huge difference for me. I really wasn't sure about starting on them to be honest, not because of some of the press they've received since I've taken a similar drug before, but because of what I'm taking them for. I have dysthymia, which is a long term, low grade depression, and as far as I can determine, I've had it for a very long time so it was very much a part of me and I was afraid of a Stepford Wives-type transformation. That didn't happen, but end the effect seems like a bit of a contradiction. I am on more of an even keel, less likely to freak out, have fewer problems with crowds and much easier to be around in general. At the same time the medication has gotten rid of the permanent grey fog that my dysthymia caused so I'm much more alert, on the ball and likely to say what's on my mind. So, what it means is that I'm still the same sarcastic, blunt, somewhat cynical person, but I'm more cheerful and relaxed about it. I'm still not sure if that's a good thing or not, and I'm definitely not sure if it means I'm safer for the general public or not. I'm less likely to break down over little things but at the same time I'm also much more likely to be really snarky.